Obese. That's how I'm starting 2010--obese. It's a hard word to include in my vocabulary, especially since its describing me. I've never had a great self-image, even when I was well under and within my ideal/healthy weight range, but now I'm obese. How did I get here?
Forget the overweight range, in the past two years I've jumped into the obese pool and it's not looking all that great.
If I were planning to be a professional linebacker or weight lifter, being 205 pounds would be great. But, I'm a 42 year old, work-from-home, 5' 3" mom who used to be a (proud) band geek. Two hundred plus pounds doesn't look good on a person like me.
Now, I've discovered that what my biggest obstacle--the fear of success. Seems strange being afraid to succeed and not fail. I know I'll fall down, screw up, do things in inefficient ways from time to time, but I'll always get up and try again.
My goal for the year was to post everyday and take a photo everyday. Well, after sorting, planning, and organizing all yesterday, it was well past midnight before I had a chance to say anything.
So here I am, a new year, a new plan, and a new determination.
Already, I've organized my closet, cleaned out clothes that don't fit (and never will), and purchased the motivation bikini. A very cute, string purple, sparkling, bikini that I've hung in my closet.
Now the hard part begins.
Saturday, January 2, 2010
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